Day Seventy Six

Day Seventy Six

 

I can not believe this is my last position in the Kama Sutra. (This is my last position, right? I haven’t, like accidentally forgotten the one where I have to hang upside down from a mirror with all the lights on or something, have I? If D. and I have somehow paged past one, please let me know since we have one more day to bang it out!)

I suggested to D. that we celebrate finishing our mission. His response: “Uh, how about by having sex?” Ha. I was thinking more along the lines of dinner or popping some champagne, but the man has a point.

Tonight we did the Love Triangle, a guy-on-top position with a carnal challenge rating of five flames. It’s only appropriate that we finish off with a difficult one. After all, we should be experts at this point.

If I were a Freudian, I would say that I had been subconsciously avoiding this one. Not because it looks especially uncomfortable or unfun, but because of the name. Love Triangle. That does not exactly get me in the mood. Maybe because lately I’ve found myself more jealous than usual of D.’s girl friends or female coworkers. And I am not a typically jealous person. I’m not totally sure why it’s happening, but I have a hunch it has something to do with the fact that the closer and more serious we get, the more I want him all to myself. (Let me know in the comments if you ever go through “waves of jealousy”.)

Anyway! We actually started the hook-up in the shower. I had been feeling ick all day and this was a nice way to get clean, but also get the foreplay going. By the time we got out of the bathroom and slightly dried off, I was rarin’ to go.

We started in—surprise, surprise—missionary. D. lifted my left leg and rested it on his shoulder. Per the instructions in the book, I stretched out my other leg so I was spread eagle. D. shifted into a somewhat kneeling position, but still between my legs.

Then we were faced with the challenge of how to get his left foot over my thigh and next to my torso. (The number of awkward moments we’ve had during these past few months makes me think perhaps we’re just awkward lovers ha!) He shifted his weight and sort of threw it over my leg. Clearly, he had to pull out to accomplish this. He placed his foot down then pressed back in to me.

The only problem was the thrusting. It’s not that he couldn’t do it. It’s just that it was the funniest. Thing. Ever. Imagine a guy on one knee gyrating his hips back and forth, a little off balance, and naked. At first I just smiled a little bit. He smiled back, surely thinking I was just enjoying the moment. Then I let out a little snort. Which he seemed to write off as some sort of cough. Then I let out a full-on laugh. I couldn’t help it!

“What the hell, S.?” he said in an annoyed tone.

“No, it’s just...the way you’re...moving,” I said, stifling the laughing as best I could.

We finished up. Or rather, he finished (after we shifted back to missionary).

I could tell something was a little off. “Everything cool?” I asked. (Word to the wise: Phrasing it like this, rather than “Are you OK?” tends to go over better with guys. Making it about the situation rather than him is just easier for a man to take.)

“Yeah. But come on, I never laugh at you in weird positions.”

Oh my god. He was offended! I’m always the sensitive, self-conscious one in bed and I never stopped to think he could feel that way too during sex.

“I wasn’t laughing at you. It’s just a silly position.” Then I snuggled up against him, vowing to remember that guys can be sensitive too.

I don’t want to go out on a bad note so I’ve decided to do a repeat of one of our favorite positions from the Kama Sutra tomorrow. That is, unless we’ve forgotten about a pose or two and have to do those on Day 77.